Learning To Let Go

It was Saturday morning and I had just loaded up my trunk with all my son’s baseball gear for his game. As he and I climbed into the car and prepared to leave for his game I realized I had forgotten my cell phone in the house. I put the car in park as I prepared to go back inside to get it. My son, anxious to get to his game, said to me, “Mom, just forget about it, let’s go!” I looked in the rear view mirror and saw that he really meant it. He didn’t want to be late. I made the decision to just “forget about it” and we headed off to the game.

I must admit that while driving to the ball field a million thoughts ran through my head about all the possible things that could go wrong and I would be stuck without a phone to call anyone. By the time we finally reached the ball field and unpacked all his gear and mine (chair, blanket etc.) I had accepted the fact that I would be phoneless for the next 2 hours. How would I ever survive?

In truth, I survived just fine. In fact, I enjoyed the game more than ever before. I was not interrupted by calls or text messages and it was heavenly!

We live in a world where everyone is connected 24/7. We either have our cell phone handy or are keeping in touch via email, facebook, twitter or the many other sources of communication. While I am not complaining about the many avenues of “staying connected” I miss the days when life was simpler. The cell phone is one of my favorite ways to stay connected, however it also interrupts my life in so many ways.

Have you ever been talking to someone in person only to have them ask you to “hold on” for a minute while they take a phone call? How does it make you feel? We all do it. Whoever is calling always seems to be more important that those we are with. This has been one of my biggest frustrations with the cell phone. I have worked in an industry for 16 years that requires a lot of communication via phone. About 10 years ago I made the decision that when I was with a client I would not answer my cell phone. I prepared all of my clients that this was how I conducted my business. I respected and valued their time and would give them my undivided attention when we were together. I also explained to them that there may be times when they would get my voicemail because I would be with another client, whom I also showed respect for by not answering my phone when I was with them. While I am the first to admit that I’m not perfect, I truly made an effort to respect the time my clients were with me.

One of the areas that was more difficult to apply this rule was when I was with my family. While I did not answer the phone when I was with a client, I would answer a client call when I was with my family. This became a frustration for my husband and children. I struggled with the “need” to catch up on client calls while we were traveling to dinner or doing other activities together. It took quite a bit of time for me to truly understand the message that I was sending to my family, “They came after my clients.” This was not the message I wanted to send.

The solution that I finally found to work was that I would schedule time with my family. They were booked in my calendar as appointments, just like my clients. I tried to honor my time with them and respect my time with them. This worked wonderfully. When I would finally return calls it would be after my appointment (whether that was with my family or a client it was the same). This made a huge difference in our relationships. My family began to see that THEY were important to me and I would give them my undivided attention. I’ll admit that it was incredibly difficult, especially when I was in the middle of negotiating a sale. However, I knew that I had to do it.

When I entered the industry I’ve worked in for the past 16 years I realized pretty quickly that far too many sacrificed their families for the business. I made a decision never to do that. As business began to take off and snowball it carried me with it. Life and work got busier and busier. It was at the height of it all that I had to step back and say, “Whoa…slow down. What’s happening here?” My family was suffering from my crazy schedule and lack of attention. I had to do something and I had to do something fast. It was then that I put on the brakes and started investing more time and energy into my family. Thank goodness I did! They are everything to me.

Take a moment to evaluate your day today. How many times did you pick up the phone to answer a call when you were spending time with your family or friends? How do you think that made them feel? Sometimes we don’t realize what we’re doing. What messages are you sending to your family? Who’s more important in the eternal scope of things? You will be amazed at the difference when you finally give your family the respect and time they deserve.

Have we really become so attached to our cell phones that we neglect those we love? We have voicemail for a reason….so people can leave us messages. Don’t be afraid to use it. Have respect for your family and friends and then respect them for doing the same. It’s okay to unplug now and then. Learn to let go…

You may or may not agree with me on this one, but take it from someone who learned this the hard way. Show those you love that they ARE important to you by giving them the respect and time they deserve. Turn your phone off, put it on silent, or just leave it home every once in a while and give them your undivided attention. They’ll appreciate it and you might actually enjoy the break from your ringing cell phone too!

Two Weeks With My Own Personal Chef

Ryan & Jessica decided to use the leftover fondant from their previous cake to decorate this one.

I didn’t know it at the time, but with the arrival of my daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter I also received the added gift of having my own personal chef for 2 weeks! My son-in-law loves to cook! For the past two weeks I have come home each day to the delicious smells of dinner cooking. As I would enter the house I could not only smell the food but hear the laughter and noise from the kitchen. It was fun to walk in to the kitchen to the sight of my daughter and son-in-law cooking. We were delighted each night with delicious meals and often a yummy treat as well!

Ryan has a delicious chocolate chip cookie recipe that he must have baked up at least 4 times during the past two weeks. He has it memorized and loves to tease everyone that he will not divulge the recipe. The cookies are absolutely HEAVEN! Twice while he was here, my daughter helped him make delicious cakes from scratch and decorated them in fun ways.

These cookies are super soft and chewy and VERY delicious!

I realized early on that Ryan was fabulous with the grill. He loved to marinate meats and cook them on the grill. He even added grilled pineapple one night which was absolutely divine. I think my absolute favorite dinner was the chicken enchiladas. I don’t know what all he put in the sauce (he refused to tell me), but they were incredible. I think I could have eaten them every single night and been extremely happy. I must admit that my goal to “eat healthy” was severely challenged during the past two weeks. But hey…it’s only two weeks, right? I probably should have taken photos of all the fabulous meals but quite honestly, I forgot. Sorry.

I know that I have slacked on my daily posts over the past two weeks but I have been busy enjoying the company of my daughter and her family. I have spent much of my free time holding my granddaughter and visiting with family. The time has flown by so fast and I was sad to have to say goodbye this morning as they left to head back to their own home. I will always treasure the time we were able to spend with them. I’m already trying to figure out how I can squeeze in a trip to visit them this summer.

Ryan & Jessica made this delicious cake and then had the audacity to bring it to my sister's home where there were a ton of rival college fans! It was absolutely hilarious!!

On another note….Yesterday I finally went to the doctor and had him look at my leg (I injured it 3 weeks ago). It was as I had expected…a bad muscle injury. He said the type of injury I have, takes at least 6 full weeks of complete rest to heal. I guess that explains why I keep re-injuring it each week as I try to push myself. I’ve finally accepted the fact that I have to give my leg the full 6 weeks to recover. Since the injury is in my right leg I’m hoping that I can still do upper body workouts. I’m going to at least give it a try so I can get some exercise in. This was disheartening news but I know I need to follow the doctors orders so that I don’t make it worse.

Sisters are the BEST!

Sometimes you just need your sister. Tonight I came home to find my sister sitting on my couch holding my granddaughter. I was thrilled to see her and happy to share Ady with her. We enjoyed a fun evening with the family laughing and catching up on life. My sister has a talent for making people laugh and I always get in plenty of laughter when we are together. After everyone else went to bed we sat around and ate apples dipped in carmel and drank hot chocolate while we caught up on life.

It reminded me of old times. My sister and I had shared a room growing up and we used to stay up late talking about boys, school and life. We are much older now but still have just as much to talk about. We probably could have talked all night but knew she still had a long drive home ahead of her.  As I gave my sister a hug I was sad to see her go but at the same time happy that she had come.

Sometimes you just need to spend time with your sister and tonight was one of those nights. I am so grateful for both of my sisters and the wonderful friends that they are to me. They always seem to show up at just the right time. Tonight I am grateful for sisters, and daughters, as I was able to spend time with both!

What are you grateful for?

As Delicate As A Flower

My random photo’s of the day are of my granddaughter. She seems to be changing more each day. Today she looked so grown up sitting on the couch in her beautiful dress looking all pretty for her daddy’s birthday. She is only 10 weeks old and is so alert and curious about everything going on around her. She is quick to smile and her whole face lights up when she does. In these photo’s she is focusing on her mommy and daddy. She sure recognizes them and their voices.

Last night I offered to get up with her all night so my daughter could get a full nights sleep. I must say that even though I was tired this morning I loved every minute of it. She is so cute and fun, even in the middle of the night.

So pretty! I can't believe she actually sat up on the couch for so long. What a cutie!

Party In The Pool

James just chillin' in the pool.

Today turned out to be “okay” weather. Well…according to my kids it was “perfect weather” for a swim! We spent the evening relaxing with family and friends around the pool. My youngest son, James, LOVES jumping off the diving board. He has all sorts of crazy dives and flips that he loves to do. It’s enough to make me catch my breath sometimes, hoping he doesn’t get hurt. He has absolutely no fear and loves the water. By the time he finally climbed out of the pool the skin on his fingertips was all shriveled up. Next to diving, his next favorite thing to do is to throw odd objects to the bottom of the pool and then dive for them. Sometimes I think he’s half fish when he’s in the water.

James taking off for his famous pencil jump.

I love getting together with family and friends. It’s one of my favorite things to do. The time seems to pass too quickly and before you know it the evening is over. Tonight was one of those nights where everything else seemed to vanish from my mind except what was happening at the moment. I spent the evening holding my granddaughter and watching my kids swim and play in the pool. Normally, I would have been in there with them, however I freely offered my services to watch Ady so my daughter and son-in-law could join the rest of the gang in the pool.

18 years difference between these two brother-in-laws and they are the best of friends.

James was thrilled to have Ryan in the pool and they spent a good portion of the evening teasing each other. I think James’ favorite part was when he tipped Ryan over in the floating chair. He laughed so hard! The biggest dare of the night was when Ryan tried getting Jessica to jump off the diving board. All the siblings joined in the begging and conversation to convince Jess to make the jump. She finally consented and walked slowly to the diving board. I think she stood on the edge of the diving board for quite a few minutes before finally jumping in. Everyone cheered and congratulated her on making the jump. I didn’t realize until later that she hadn’t jumped off a diving board since she was a little girl. Way to go Jess!!!

Taking time for family and friends is so important. BEING in the moment, and TRULY enjoying it, is what life is all about. Take time to LAUGH and find the JOY in each and every day. It makes life so much more fun. How much did you laugh today?

Gotta love the goggles!

One Really Big Leaf and One Tiny Little Baby

One Really Big Leaf and One Really Tiny Baby

My son walked in to the house a few minutes ago holding one of the largest leaves I have ever seen! He told me it was time to harvest some more rhubarb. I cannot believe how large our rhubarb plants are! We’ve not had hardly any sun, just lots of rain. I guess that’s what they like because they are massive plants already and summer hasn’t even begun.

Ady was a great sport for the quick photo shoot!

One look at the leaf, and one glance at little Ady, and the camera’s came out in force. After washing the leaf thoroughly we carefully placed my granddaughter on it for a quick photo shoot. My son made sure we knew to be careful and not let Ady eat any of the leaf. We quickly snapped our photos and then gave Ady a good cleaning to make sure she didn’t have any “leaf” residue on her. She was a great sport in spite of being taken from a nice warm blanket and being placed on a cold, damp leaf.

These photos should give you an idea of how large our plants are! Have you ever seen a leaf so big?

Laughter & Smiles Filled My Night

Smiling babies make the world so much better!

Tonight I came home to my darling granddaughter smiling and laughing. Her daddy sure knows how to make her smile!

My ray of sunshine at the end of the day.

My daughter and I just sat and laughed along with her as her daddy made her smile and laugh. I think I could spend my whole day just holding her and watching her cute expressions. Babies sure do make the world a happier place.

You know the old saying, “Laughter is the best medicine?” Well, I believe it! Everyone should take time to laugh during their day. If you haven’t laughed yet today, hopefully these pictures will make you smile.

Look for ways to add laughter to your day and you will find your day goes much smoother.

Gotta Get Back On Track

She is way more fun than exercise!

I was all set to get back on track this week with P90X but then my daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter showed up. I am having so much fun spending time with them that I’ve been neglecting my exercise. When I visited them a couple months ago I faithfully exercised every day. Why not now? I can tell you why…

Here, I am in my own home with children of my own to take care of, work to accomplish, meals to be cooked, a house to be cleaned, baseball games to attend and so on. When I was visiting them I was a visitor with nothing to do but help with the baby and help around the house. There is always more to do at home.

Jessica and I did go walking a couple of days ago but that is the extent of my exercise since my injury a couple of weeks ago. I NEED to get back on track. Time to kick myself back into gear and start working out again. Two weeks off and I feel like I’m turning into Jello.

If only I could put my granddaughter down long enough to exercise…

They are only here for a little while and I want to enjoy as much time as I can with them. Oh the struggle I face each day…LOL

Mother’s Day Reflections

My daughter helped me to create a beautiful arrangement of tulips from my yard for my mom. We had just as much fun creating it as we did giving it.

As I sit writing this post I am watching my oldest daughter fall asleep on the couch. She is sitting up holding her precious little baby and they are both fast asleep. It’s been a long day…

I woke up this morning to Jessica, Ryan & Ady bringing me breakfast in bed! It was wonderful. Ady was all dressed in a beautiful little dress and was sound asleep in her father’s arms. As Jessica handed me the breakfast tray I looked longingly at Ady. Ryan held her up so I could see how pretty she looked this morning. I was tempted to put the breakfast tray aside and take my granddaughter instead, however the steaming french toast smelled delicious and my stomach began to rumble. I was delighted by the beautifully framed collage of photos that Jessica was handing me. It was filled with photos of my granddaughter, daughter and even a family photo with Ryan, which I’d been asking for.

The rest of the day was just as wonderful as the morning and ended with a huge gathering at my parents home in celebration of Mother’s Day. As I sat on the couch and looked around at all the cousins, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles etc. I felt at peace. Everyone was happy and excited to see one another again. The cousins LOVE getting together and it was fun to watch them all as they chatted excitedly with each other.

We spent some time celebrating all the mom’s in the room and had fun as everyone shared fun experiences about the various moms. While we were celebrating Mother’s Day everyone could hardly wait for their turn to hold baby Ady for the first time. It was a fun filled evening with laughter and smiles.

As I sit here and watch my daughter fall asleep with my granddaughter in her arms, I am reminded of the many nights that I sat on the couch rocking my own children to sleep. I can still remember vividly those first few months after my daughter was born. It seemed that I spent most of my nights on the couch feeding her at odd hours. Sometimes, I too would doze off with her in my arms. Many times, I would just sit and marvel at the beauty of my daughter and the love that I had for her. The bond between a mother and child is immeasurable. The love and sacrifice we give to bring them into the world, and the days and nights we spend raising them create something beautiful and lasting.

On this day, I am grateful for my own mother and the wonderful example, and pillar of strength, she has been to me through the years. She and my dad provided a loving home for me, and my siblings, and raised us to be good, honest, hard-working people. They taught us to love one another through their example. They showed us that integrity, honesty, kindness, forgiveness, and love are all critical attributes to have. They have continued to be there for all of us as we have struggled with the challenges of life. They continue to be an example to us as we have all become parents, and now grandparents ourselves.

I have tried, and continue to try, to raise my children in a similar manner that my parents did. I think my siblings and I turned out alright. If I can do as good a job as they did then I will be happy. As our children grow up and begin to have families of their own we begin to see the process repeat itself. That is when we see the fruits of our labor. As I watch my daughter with her own little girl I am filled with love and admiration for her. She is just beginning her new role of “mother” and she is doing a wonderful job. She cares tenderly for Ady and is filled with love for her own family. It is fun to see the humor and laughter between she and her husband and the love that they share for their little girl. I sit here content tonight thinking to myself, “I guess I did alright in raising her.” She is now fulfilling the role of mother and wife and is doing a beautiful job.

Much of what I taught my daughter (and continue to teach my other children) I learned from my own parents. I am grateful for the incredible blessing I had to grow up in a loving, wonderful home that was filled with laughter and kindness. I am grateful for my mother and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a mother. It is by far my greatest blessing in life.

Speechless For The First Time

Just what I needed after a rough week! Completely content to hold my granddaughter today.

I had barely hit “publish” on my last post when I heard my husband walking down the stairs to my office. A smile slowly spread across my face as I waited for him to enter. I had not seen him for 5 days and I had missed him terribly. As he appeared in the doorway of the office he said, “Look what I found on the porch!” I looked to see what he was holding and was thoroughly confused. He was holding a pink blanket. At first I could not see anything else and was confused why there would be a pink blanket on our porch. As he walked closer I noticed a teeny tiny foot sticking out from under the blanket. I looked up at my husband with complete and utter confusion on my face.

Normally, my mind works at lightening speed (see my recent post Thunder & Lightening) but at the moment it had come to a complete stop. It was at that moment that my husband stood before me and peeled the blanket back to reveal the most precious little face of my granddaughter. I quite literally stood speechless and in shock. My mind, and my eyes, were not quite making sense of what I was seeing. I recognized Ady immediately but was completely confused.

I looked at my husband and started rambling off quickly, “Is Jess here? Have they been standing on the porch? How long have they been standing there? Did you arrive home at the same time?” My mind was reeling with the fact that my daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter had been standing on our porch while I was downstairs writing my last blog post, unaware that they were even here. My husband started laughing as he replied, “No. They picked me up and we drove home together.” By this point I was utterly confused. My husband had spent the last week in Kennewick and I wasn’t sure “where” they had picked him up. At this point my daughter and son-in-law walked in the room. I was so surprised by the whole event that I began to weep tears of joy. They all looked at me like I was crazy, but I didn’t care. I not only had my husband home, but my daughter, son-in-law and darling granddaughter!

After a few minutes of hugs & kisses, they explained that Jessica & Ryan had picked my husband up from Kennewick and brought him home with them. Of course this brought a whole new stream of questions about where was his car and boat and who was bringing them home? Finally, I understood. They had all been plotting for weeks to surprise me and had it all worked out in advance.

I must admit that this was by far the biggest and best surprise I’ve ever had. I literally had no idea. No one had leaked a word. I had spoken to my daughter just a couple of hours before and she had not let on at all that she was riding in the car with my husband on her way here.

This is definitely the best Mother’s Day gift I could receive (and 2 days early to boot!).